September 7, 2008

(Paraphrase) Steve Harper: “Democracy Sucks, I Must Have a Dictatorship”

By liam

Of course he didn’t say that.  I know that.  But he may as well have said it.

We all know the news today and the excuse the Steve has been using for some time.  This government is not working.  We can’t get anything done.  I didn’t get the orange truck this morning.  Wah wah wah.

And what did they want to get done?  Sell the CBC?  What am I saying … the Republicans Conservatives would just prefer to give it away to a corporate chum who’s paid for their campaign (or who just gave them top prime-time TV air space to promote Steve’s minivan commercials).

Or finally get rid of all of those pesky gay marriages that have blemished God’s great country?

Or support McCain with the invasion of Iran?  No, not that McCain , although poisonous food would be a lot less costly than guns and ammo.

Or level the province of Ontario and force its citizens to work 2-year’s mandatory sentence in the Tar Sands?

Who knows what they couldn’t get accomplished, but their record speaks to what they did accomplish:

  • Canada’s longest lasting minority government (I’m pretty sure, but I’m not 100% sure)
  • 3 budgets (although now we get a new budget every day, with these guys spending like virgins calling a 900 line at their grandma’s house)
  • passage of lord knows how many pieces of legislation (except the Lord of course, because Canada belongs to God … or the Republicans Conservatives, who I think own 100% of God Inc.)
  • a short-lived meat plague because of the elimination of the ‘teeth’ of Canadian health inspectors (brought to you by Health Minister Tony ‘Dr Death’ Clement who also starred in the "Walkerton Follies"
  • Bill C-10, where only lollipops (although potentially phallic) and sunny afternoons are allowed to get funding for film work in Canada
  • Bill C-51, where possession of Vitamin C (or least Vitamin D) will get you 5 year’s mandatory sentence … working in the Tar Sands
  • A long and loving relationship with George W, the greatest pirate in the west.

What’s ironic is that Steve has come out swinging and he’s actually got the stones to say that he got lots of shit accomplished!!  Yeah, because we live in a democracy.  The Liberals propped him up for the last 2 years and he’s just plain sick of them doing all his dirty work.

Just to top it all off, he says that his opponents will come out and attack him and make it personal.  Why the hell not?!?  Who else did you let make a decision in the last 30 months?  Can Peter Mackay even fart without your permission?

Anyways folks, I know I’m on a rant, but Steve:  You can’t talk out of both sides of your ass!!  Did you or did you not get anything accomplished in the last 30 months?

People:  Steve doesn’t want a democracy.  He wants to have a ‘triumph’ where he’s declared Imperator by …