Ladies and Gentlemen: The Gulf of Mexicoil! (Brought to you by BP)
That’s right, ladies and gentlemen! The Gulf of Mexicoil awaits you!
Imagine a future where you can simply go to the coast and dip your bucket into the Gulf waters and scoop out a pile of lovely, black goop, thick with the goodness of the end of earth and only with a few minor inconveniences like fish bones, turtles shells and dead birds.
You too can have a scoop of the future and see what we’re all in for!
Believe the spin. We did nothing wrong and we had no idea it would be this big! Honestly.
Just whatever you do, no matches, OK? We’d hate to ignite the world’s biggest roman candle in waiting!
OK. Seriously: the only thing that we should be figuring out is how we can strip BP (and any other companies that let this disaster happen) of their corporate status.
Yeah … they should cease to exist. Corporate armageddon.
Why worry about a boycott when there should be nothing to boycott?